Sick

do you know what is the worst? being sick and helpless is such a yucky feeling. my head is turning, my stomach is aching and i feel like i am going to throw up. well i did through up all of my lunch of pasta. i think i have a stomach flu or food poisoning. not really sure. being sick you learn to let people serve you.

piret gave me saltines and sprite.
johnny gave me some stomach relief stuff
rae offered some mac and cheese but i have not been able to eat it.

its great to have friends to take care of you. i feel like crap but i will survive thanks to my good friends.

Weeds in our life

through hard work and patience, you get the beauty that is all covered in the weeds. they may be hard to pull or hoe but in the end there is satisfaction. the kind of satisfaction that comes from hard work and the sweat on your forehead. i got to thinking when i was hoeing these weeds covering the beauty of the flowers or rather distracting the eye from the beauty, that i can apply this hoeing experience to life. we may not see the real beauty of things at first but through hard work and patience we may see what we were supposed to see. it just takes effort!

Annoyance

the other night we could not sleep cause of a unwanted guest. im sure any of you would recognize this unwanted guest as a house fly, also known as Musca domestica. we were going to crazy hearing its buzzing sound, so we decided to get rid of it some how. we, however did not have a fly swatter, so rae found the next best thing, her bra... the fly got a bit mad and flew in all directions so very fast until it got swatted to the ground. the was won as far as we could tell. we were able to sleep at least. the next morning we heard that buzzing sound. im sure it was a cousin of his....

New Summer!

this summer has definitely been new kind of summer that i have had since i have graduated. it just amazes me in all that i have been able to do and will be doing, especially on the social aspect of the other gender. allmy cares are work and socializing, which seems out of the norm for me. how does this summer make it different from the others? well let me tell you.

2005= work at the dealership, no social life
2006= girls camp counselor
2007= girls camp counselor
2008= MTC
2009= in FINLAND as a missionary

this summer takes on a new adventure for sure, it feels good and new and exciting. there is one thing in common with all these summers.... i was and am in the right place at the right time. i have felt that i am suppose to be here in happy valley (provo). i may not know why now but im sure i will figure that one out at some point.


SUMMER pics of the last 5 years!

this summers pictures are sure to come..... get ready!

Happy Summer!

Peace

Pretty in pink

me and my friend rae were in charge of a baby shower for a good friend of ours. we realized we had pink shorts and decided to be twins for the shower. we are a little nerdy but we love it! yeah for pink!

Quails

For the past couple of weeks i have heard this really weird bird sound and i could not figure it out. it got pretty annoying and would wake me up in the mornings or when ever i tried to take a nap. then just yesterday i heard it again with a bunch of other Little sounds. i look out my window and behold this is what i found..... baby quails!

i walked out my apt to get a better look and this is as far as i got before they all scattered in the bushes. i had never seen baby quails before and boy are they cute! so now i know that mystery sound

things will work out...

"things will work out. keep trying. be believing. be happy. don't get discouraged. things will work"- Gordan B. Hinckley

i just saw this quote while cleaning up
and it gave me a lot of peace.
i always get so stressed around
finals and at other times
of life. this thought reminds me
when times are hard or difficult,
i need to do all that i can
and things will work out.
after all "adam fell
that men might
be that they
might have
JOY!"

don't know what to say...

i am bloged out tonight. i have so many thoughts in my mind that every time i try to post something, it just comes out jumbled. i do have to say my creativeness is coming out this summer and johnny is one great sewer! boo yaa!

answered prayer!

one of my summer goals is to make it to the temple as often as possible. so far i have been able to make it each week for three weeks. today i was almost stopped in being able to go. me and my friend were on our way to the temple. i parked my car and realized i did not know where i had put my recommend. i searched all the places i thought i should be, but i could not find it anywhere. i told my friend she should just go and i would pick her up later. she was determined that i would get into the temple and find the temple recommend. she said "we should pray". a light bulb went off in my head and i was thinking, what a great idea. i said a little prayer (it so reminded me from when we were missionary companions. it was great!). after the prayer, she said we need to look in the car because she knew it had to be there. low and behold it was under a seat. it was amazing! i was able to do some work for my dutch ansesters as well as estonian ansesters of my friend. it was so great to do such great work. the moral of this story is, God answers prayers!

heart ache

do you ever feel like you want to help someone so badly but you are so far away from them that it is kind of hard to help them out? well this is my problem. i have grown so close to this person but she is oversees and it is killing me that i can't be there by her side. i am the type of person that want s to take the heart ache from a person. i hate to see or hear that someone is in pain or trouble. i want to do all i can to take it away. for her all i can do is send her the occasional email and pray hard that someone will be there to help her out. i then remembered that there is someone that she can count on, as well as for me and you. that is our Savior Jesus Christ. he suffered for us all, he took upon all our pains that we have ever encountered. when we are feeling alone and in pain, he is right there by our side.

like old times

its been about 6 months since i last saw my "mamma" and just yesterday night i saw her at the airport standing there. i went up and gave her one of my big bear hugs. there was also a couple of other peeps that are my sisar and veli, (pretty much family). today i spent a good chunk of time with my "mamma" and the roles switched from her knowing everything to me knowing and showing and exploring a new world to her. walking with her around campus made feel like i was back to being her toveri. those were good times when we were. now we get to be friends in the same complex.

being in the same complex with her is something i call meant to be. let me explain... i was kind of thrown into this apt at the last min and now i am so grateful that i am here because of the people i ahve been able to meet because of being here. my apt complex is very small 12 apt in all and pretty far away from campus. one day i was talkin to my toveri and it had been about a month since i had moved to this apt and i asked her where she was livin and she told me. i could not believe my ears... she is living in the same complex two floors above. perhaps there is more to be learned from each other...

a job well done

have you ever felt like you have done great at your job? well for the first time today i felt that way at my new job. i work at apx as a customer support person and i was helping this lady, she was so happy what i had been doing for her and genuinely careing about her. she was glad i didn't sound like a robot like most call centers. she said i was great and sweat. she asked to speak to my supervisor to talk about me. he said in the 2 min call that he talked to her she said that i was

amazing

7 times. it feels great to be recoginzed at a job well done.

Blind????

have you ever felt you were doing something that you don't know why you were doing it? i think there has been plenty of times like that for me, whether it was because my friends were all doing it, or my parents told me that it was the way to go. i thought to my self, why do i do the things i do. am i doing something because i want to, to please some one, or because i feel it is right and maybe non of the above. i feel like i have grown accustomed to doing things that i don't know why i do them. as i have gotten older i have begun to realize a few things. when it came to doing what my parents have thought what was/is best for me, i did it because i trusted them and i knew they would not lie to me. some might say it was blind obedience but for me it all comes down to trust and what we feel inside is right. being a youngster, you don't always know what is best for you so you have your parents to guide you a long. i think of it like this, a blind person can not see in front of them, but they can sense things and they have their guide dog to lead them. the dog is a trusted figure in their lives and the dog leads them to safety. in a spiritual aspect my God is my guide and that is why he has given me instructions such as scriptures, a prophet, commandments, holy ghost etc. oh how great is he? that is pure proof that he loves us. he did not leave us here to sort things blindly

sundays

sundays are perhaps my favorite day of the week. it always seems to rejuvenate me for the week and keeps me on track. i seem to learn a bit more about my self as well as what i need to be doing for my self. my worries don't seem as big, nor my sorrows. i gain a bigger and broader perspective of life.

chacos!!!!!!

yes! i finally am going to get chacos! i just ordered them to day, or should i say sat. i have wanted a pair for at least 3 years and i finally decided i would get them, despite the cost. everyone i know that has them love them and they last forever! they look great and are comfortable. i should be getting them in 7 business days. katsotaan!

people who have blessed my life

you know i ahve so many things to be thankful for, i feel like i have been blessed a lot by the man above. these blessing have been even more evident to me since i have been home from finland. i have had trials and hard times but i feel like my blessings over weigh the times i have struggled. a special thanks to my good friends that are a blessing in my life:
my parents- they have been so supportive of me in helping me get up on my feet again. i really could not have survived these past months with out them.
my fiends before the mission, especially rae, have been so helpful and loving. i can always count on them.
friends from the mission- when moving to a new city and new school they have been very helpful in helping me to get social and out there. they were my friends when i had none. they will deffinately be life friends.
john, adam, jake, and brian from my new ward are greats! they have accepted me and have really played a big impact on me. they accepted me from the begining and helped me transition into a new ward fast. i have learned much from them all.
lastly my sisters: i can always count on them. they always have great words of wisdom to give me and are very supportive of me.

i love you all! those not mentioned, know you have played a big part in my life as well. i love you!

life be like

do you ever wish life could be so simple like when you were a little kid? i sometimes do! your only cares are who you are going to go play with. everything was provided and you really did not have any responsibilities besides chores. now that i am older, wiser, and on my own half way, there are so many things i have to do and be responsible for. as a kid your friendships are a lot more simpler too. you did not have to worry about if they were going to get in a serious relationship. that is something i really hate now. it seems this has happened alot with my friends that are guys. we are great friends and thenvthey get a girl friend... the friendship is just not the same as before nor can it be because the girlfriend would be jealous. but well that is just life..

life roller coster ride

it seems to me that life brings a lot of different things into our lives as well as different emotions. i don't know if it is just me or if it is because of being home from a mission but since i have been back for the last 6 months it has been very different from what i have expected. i feel like i have gone through almost all of my emotions and it has been a roller coaster ride. everyday that goes by i seem to learn more about who i am and what i want and trying to do what i can to help my self to improve. what i have notice in the last little while is that there are people that come into your life for a reason. they are either there to help you out or for you to help them out. this is why i treasure those that come into my life and i do not think it is coincidence.

peace, kate

multicultural

school this semester has certainly been interesting as well as been enlightening. i particularly love my multicultural class. i learned so much about my self and others. i thought i would post a little what i have learned:

• Unless truth changes you, it’s just information.

• We teach what we are, not what we know.

• I speak through the history of my experience, and you understand through the history of your experience.

• Sure way to failure is to please all. – Bill Cosby

• God won’t need to ask what we believe.

• Fear blocks the reception of perfect love.

• Never fear. Trust.

• Be approachable in order to create trust.

• Try studying “ego”

• If your story matches my story, you give me status.

• Reality= product of our experience.

• “Judge Up “ ~ Give everyone you meet an A even if they haven’t reached their potential

• Emotion = information. You can change your feelings.

• Tolerance = not agreement, engagement

• Salt of the earth . . . Can’t salt salt!

• If you live in fear, you can’t build a high enough wall. Love needs no wall. You have angels. Pragmatics = not fear.

• When God wants to change you, He changes your questions - - gives you experiences only He has the answer for.

• Illiterate = those who can’t learn, unlearn, and relearn, not those who can’t read or write. – Alvin Toefler

• Social vs. Unique Self: stand in your truth.

• Sin is the result of unmet needs – Elder Hales

• Racism = discrimination, group superiority

• Discrimination = deny legitimate rights

• Person with experience is never at mercy with the one with an argument

• Never free to love unconditionally what you are trying to change. – Rabbi Naomi Levi

• Pattern of Correcting (not punishing) – D&C 95:1
• Love, Chasten, Way out, Love you

• Correct means to make pure again, change directions

• Leadership doesn’t equal position. It equals action, doesn’t wait for a calling.

• Don’t know your power until you see how far you’re going to go.

• Common + Unity = Community; doesn’t just happen.

• Don’t know what you don’t know so you shouldn’t punish people for what they don’t know.

• Teach norms and honor the individual

• Challenge – create community, not celebrate community

• Emotional Dishonesty = can’t love yourself cause you don’t know what self to love.

• Dysfunctional to feel important or needed to save (bridge example)

• Don’t punish by withholding love

• Feel it and release it

• Lowest state = when we’re in shame

• Highest state = gratitude

• Perspective = about the things you know, comes from experience, happens in context

• 1. Stay in the heart of grace

Slow to take offense

Benefit of the doubt

Compassion

Flush emotional toilet bowl

• 2. Never assume

Your experience is not their experience

Our assumptions of others reveal us

• 3. Get into their world

“What” questions (what does _____ mean to you? Etc.)

Go in with your shoes off (it’s sacred ground)

Don’t expect to influence without first being willing to be influenced

• 4. Be what they need to be

• 5. Give them what they need to succeed

• Things are only symbolic

• Relationship’s key word = relate

• Can’t relate through your assumptions

• Relate to their definition

• In looking at what we know, we might miss what’s on the other side.

• Don’t be arrogant in your knowledge

• Opposition in not to all things

• Changes give God a chance to show up in a bigger way

• You can hold people down by the way you treat them

• Empathetic listening (to hear pain), a form of validating the right to hurt

• We don’t want people to come in and fix our story

• You don’t know what pains people are carrying around

• People in pain want to know someone cares.

• Boyd K. Packer - Any virtue taken to extreme loses its virtue

• Ideas have consequences

• If you want a blessing, go be a blessing

• Multiculturalism is a way of viewing relating and a way of thinking and not just content about various ethnic, racial, and cultural groups.

• Avoid talking someone out of this or her experience.

• Equal doesn’t mean fair

• Even the best team has to call time-out once in a while.

• Honor people the way they show up ~ no fixing.

• Show up in a way that honors other people

.

summer list

it has been awhile since i have really had a summer to do things that i want, its actually been about 5 years. so i really want to make this summer bomb. i have a few things i want to do as well as doing things i have not planned on. my only problem is the whole money thing... i don't have much and so i am limited in my resources. but here are the things i want to do.

• read harry potter 7
• write in this blog
• go rafting
• camping as much as possible
• go on a bike ride and possibly ride a tandem
• play night games
• go to a drive in movie theater
• hike timp
• eat a j- dawgs hot dog
• go to all the utah temples
• go to st. george
• boating
• learn something new
• swim (maybe 7 peaks)
• go on a road trip possibly to california
• get chacos
• do service
• go to the temple often
• write missionaries
• read other books

so that is my list not sure i will be able to accomplish all of these but i really want to try. mostly i really just want to make some memories this summer. not that the past summers haven't been memorable but i want to make new memories. welp i think that is it.
peace!